This is revolting:

Tens of thousands of US inmates are paid from pennies to minimum wage—minus fines and victim compensation—for everything from grunt work to firefighting to specialized labor. Here’s a sampling of what they make, and for whom.

Eating in: Each month, California inmates process more than 680,000 pounds of beef, 400,000 pounds of chicken products, 450,000 gallons of milk, 280,000 loaves of bread, and 2.9 million eggs (from 160,000 inmate-raised hens). Starbucks subcontractor Signature Packaging Solutions has hired Washington prisoners to package holiday coffees (as well as Nintendo Game Boys). Confronted by a reporter in 2001, a Starbucks rep called the setup “entirely consistent with our mission statement.”

Around the Big House: Texas inmates produce brooms and brushes, bedding and mattresses, toilets, sinks, showers, and bullwhips. Bullwhips?

Windows dressing: In the mid-1990s, Washington prisoners shrink-wrapped software and up to 20,000 Microsoft mouses for subcontractor Exmark (other reported clients: Costco and JanSport). “We don’t see this as a negative,” a Microsoft spokesman said at the time. Dell used federal prisoners for PC recycling in 2003, but stopped after a watchdog group warned that it might expose inmates to toxins.

Back to school: Texas and California inmates make dorm furniture and lockers, diploma covers, binders, logbooks, library book carts, locker room benches, and juice boxes.

Patriotic duties: Federal Prison Industries, a.k.a. Unicor, says that in addition to soldiers’ uniforms, bedding, shoes, helmets, and flak vests, inmates have “produced missile cables (including those used on the Patriot missiles during the Gulf War)” and “wiring harnesses for jets and tanks.” In 1997, according to Prison Legal News, Boeing subcontractor MicroJet had prisoners cutting airplane components, paying $7 an hour for work that paid union wages of $30 on the outside.

The law won: In Texas, prisoners make officers’ duty belts, handcuff cases, and prison-cell accessories. California convicts make gun containers, creepers (to peek under vehicles), and human-silhouette targets.

A stitch in time: California inmates sew their own garb. In the 1990s, subcontractor Third Generation hired 35 female South Carolina inmates to sew lingerie and leisure wear for Victoria’s Secret and JCPenney. In 1997, a California prison put two men in solitary for telling journalists they were ordered to replace “Made in Honduras” labels on garments with “Made in the usa.”

Open wide: At California’s prison dental laboratory, inmates produce a complete prosthesis selection, including custom trays, try-ins, bite blocks, and dentures.

Constructive criticism: Prisoners in for burglary, battery, drug and gun charges, and escape helped build a Wal-Mart distribution center in Wisconsin in 2005, until community uproar halted the program. (Company policy says, “Forced or prison labor will not be tolerated by Wal-Mart.”)

On call: Its inmate call centers are the “best kept secret in outsourcing,” Unicor boasts. In 1994, a contractor for gop congressional hopeful Jack Metcalf hired Washington state prisoners to call and remind voters he was pro-death penalty. Metcalf, who prevailed, said he never knew.

Why don’t you start kissing your Ghandi statue and protest the death penalty, then? It’s because you’re afraid to admit the obvious: you want murderists and rapists to get a maximum 1 year prison sentence, and you wish to make every other kind of crime legal and acceptable to our children. Of course, this is really typical blather coming from someone that has knee-jerk reactions against outsourcing. Let’s look at the reasons why outsourcing is good for Americans, and why you should love it, too:

1. NAFTA was signed into law by your favorite ass to kiss, Bill Clinton. In fact, that is the ONLY reason why naive patriots voted for Clinton in 1996. I was considering giving the Clintons a break, since they were among the biggest supporters of the agreement, but then they had to go and fornicate and draw up plans for killing political opponents, both theirs and their friends. (Then again, Hillary did reprove herself…
2. Outsourcing gives lazy poor foreigners an opportunity to do something with their lives and actually help out the economy of America, not to mention improve the standards of their own countries. If it weren’t for outsourcing, India would still be measuring things with rocks.
3. Outsourcing encourages OUR lazy poor to stop whining about bad payments and joining labor unions, and start actually giving a flip about their jobs. Once this happens, they won’t be poor for much longer.
4. Do you like your elitist lifestyle, liberals? Then support outsourcing, just like appreciative conservatives do. Without it, there’d be no cheap groceries (which, when they go expensive, you predictably blame on Bush) for you lazy poor people, or any nice toys or video games.
5. It brings primitive people Christianity, which is an essential part of becoming a first world country AND acheiving salvation. Liberals, however, want the world to be taken over by Muslims, so of course this would go against your beliefs. The other four, however, would only bring good to you.

I actually think that the criminals all have it too easy; God mandates that many of them should be executed, and many others should be forced into indentured servitude/slavery, under ownership of businesses, until they have paid off their debts and accepted Jesus. Undermining noble causes such as replacing ‘Made in Honduras’ labels with ‘Made in USA’ labels should also be met with swift retribution.

In short, if you oppose forced criminal labor, you make about as much sense as Islamism, Helioleftism, Doorbellism, Firebreathingism, Darwinism, Marxism, Liberalism, New Deal ism, Progression, Transvestism, or any other nonsense ‘ism’ you can think of. When we label your kind as an enemy of the state, our prisoners will have one more thing to worry about before they get bored.