Posted by: Objective Scrutator | July 27, 2008

Open Fornication Thread

Juan wanted to take a swim in the pool at 9:00 last night, but he said that he encountered a couple fornicating. Obviously, in a public pool or motel pool, fornication is wrong. What do you think their punishment should be? Should they be beheaded publicly? Should the male be castrated and the female mutilated? Should they be branded with a scarlet A? Discuss.

Posted in Democrats, Education, Feminism, Law, Liberals, OS Reactions, Objective Scrutator, Predictions, Terrorism

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Responses

  1. How about a high five?

    By: Elephant Bones on July 28, 2008
    at 4:07 am

  2. The punishment should match the crime.

    By: David Lamb on July 28, 2008
    at 1:23 pm

  3. THEM MOONBATS TERRIFIED ME OUT OF MY PANTS I CANT BELIEVE THE HOTEL DIDNT TAKE ACTION HOW CAN YOYU MOONBATS BE NICE TO THE,M

    By: Juan Rico on July 28, 2008
    at 8:30 pm

  4. “How about a high five?”

    I hope you are joking about your suggestion for punishment. If you are, I pity you for turning a blind eye to the willingness of perverts to release their flagella into hotel pools. If you aren’t, I pity you for thinking that people can fornicate anywhere they please.

    “The punishment should match the crime.”

    So you support castration and genital mutilation? That’s a good option _ in fact, I think that Ancient Israel had penalties like this for public displays of affection.

    “THEM MOONBATS TERRIFIED ME OUT OF MY PANTS I CANT BELIEVE THE HOTEL DIDNT TAKE ACTION HOW CAN YOYU MOONBATS BE NICE TO THE,M”

    Relax, Juan. The hotel isn’t allowing them in the pool anymore. What concerns me is how they are essentially getting off scot-free for their sins.

    By: Ixion on July 28, 2008
    at 8:48 pm

  5. “the willingness of perverts to release their flagella into hotel pools.”
    Believe me, that’s hardly the worst thing that gets in a hotel pool.

    “The hotel isn’t allowing them in the pool anymore. ”
    Totally worth it.

    “What concerns me is how they are essentially getting off scot-free for their sins.”
    I don’t know if you realize this yet, but Christianity doesn’t rule the world anymore. Since science came along and showed people the truth, you guys have lost most of your power.

    By: Elephant Bones on July 29, 2008
    at 2:26 am

  6. To determine the proper Biblical punishment, we need more information. Was the harlot betrothed to another man? Was she another man’s concubine? Is this pool inside or outside of city limits? These details matter to God.

    By: Society of Christians for the Restoration of Old Testament Morality on July 29, 2008
    at 11:52 am

  7. man, why a hotel pool? isnt that what hotel beds are for? I will admit they are stupid, but they are probalbly young and get all exited about that kind of stuff. you know, “Being bad.” like fifth graders sneaking into a rated R movie.

    By: Hether on July 29, 2008
    at 12:04 pm

  8. “Believe me, that’s hardly the worst thing that gets in a hotel pool.”

    Urine is probably worse empirically, but mentally, nothing can be worse than flagella.

    “Totally worth it.”

    If there are two fornicators in your private pool (assuming you have one), you’re going to want to punish them with more than a simple “SCRAM!”.

    “I don’t know if you realize this yet, but Christianity doesn’t rule the world anymore. Since science came along and showed people the truth, you guys have lost most of your power.”

    Science is a fraud, exploited by PBS and other moonbat organizations for money. What could be more appealing than bogus photos of dinosaurs duking it out? As for your offensive statement on Christianity, think before you speak. We control the classrooms now _ the people of Texas (other than you, your two friends, and this scared little treefrog) overwhelmingly support our efforts. Just listen to the fear in her tone!

    “To determine the proper Biblical punishment, we need more information.”

    Exactly. No stone shall be left unturned; every last detail must be unearthed and published in constant press releases. To stay out of others’ sex lives is an affront against the LORD and common sense.

    “Was the harlot betrothed to another man?”

    I doubt it, since they were doing it in a hotel, meaning that they had to rent a room together. Even atheists are smart enough to check up on their concubines every night before bed.

    “Was she another man’s concubine?”

    She was nobody’s concubine. That’s another concern, and one that we need to spread to Answers in Genesis and the MSM.

    “Is this pool inside or outside of city limits?”

    The pool was inside Aurora, Colorado. I’m not sure if Aurora is Christian or not _ on the one hand, it gave birth to John Kerry, and has many unionized workers. On the other hand, one of its congressional districts has Tancredo (soon to be retiring) as its representative.

    “These details matter to God.”

    If you can contemplate a question, you can bet God demands an answer.

    “man, why a hotel pool? isnt that what hotel beds are for? I will admit they are stupid, but they are probalbly young and get all exited about that kind of stuff. you know, “Being bad.” like fifth graders sneaking into a rated R movie.”

    I don’t know, Hether. They didn’t just want to violate God’s commandments on adultery and fidelity; they wanted to make their sins public, and in such a way that others would be inconvenienced.

    By: Ixion on July 29, 2008
    at 11:04 pm

  9. Shoot them. Castrating/mutilating them is just going to encourage them to become trannies, and branding ‘A’s on their chest isn’t going to stop them from doing it… most Americans don’t even know who Hawthorne is. The deceitful liberals here will also try to increase the scenarios of couples fornicating in pools where 13 year old girls swim, thus increasing the amount of teenage pregancies, rape cases, and Democrats.

    By: Pokey Minch on July 29, 2008
    at 11:48 pm

  10. “If there are two fornicators in your private pool (assuming you have one), you’re going to want to punish them with more than a simple “SCRAM!”.”
    Actually, I probably would let them off with a warning. The first time, anyway.

    “As for your offensive statement on Christianity, think before you speak. ”
    That article seems to indicate that you are losing that battle. Pretty badly, too.

    “We control the classrooms now – the people of Texas overwhelmingly support our efforts.”
    Yet you still can’t get Creationist science to be taught on a state-wide scale. Excuse me whilst I chuckle at your pseudo-science.

    “Science is a fraud”
    So he boasts on the INTERNET, typing on a COMPUTER, sitting in a house WITH ALL THE MODERN COMFORTS, no doubt taking or have taken some form of MEDICINE at some point in his life. If Science is a fraud, then we live in a fantasy world. Free your mind, Bob.

    By: Elephant Bones on July 30, 2008
    at 3:08 am

  11. hey maybe you all should check out my resent post on creationism. That will get all your brains ticking. my brain hurts already from reading all this. but, technology and science is great, but evil at the same time. it is a love/hate relationship.

    By: Hether on July 30, 2008
    at 12:57 pm

  12. “Shoot them. Castrating/mutilating them is just going to encourage them to become trannies, and branding ‘A’s on their chest isn’t going to stop them from doing it… most Americans don’t even know who Hawthorne is. The deceitful liberals here will also try to increase the scenarios of couples fornicating in pools where 13 year old girls swim, thus increasing the amount of teenage pregancies, rape cases, and Democrats.”

    You are easily my most insightful commentor, Pokey. Using the observation that terrorists enjoy waterboarding, these fornicators would probably enjoy becoming a transsexual or wearing ‘A’s on their chest (which is fashionable in PETA circles, or so I’m told). Killing them would send them to the land of fire and brimstone much faster, which nobody enjoys, no matter how much they want to pretend.

    “Actually, I probably would let them off with a warning. The first time, anyway.”

    So why don’t you want them to be punished in a hotel pool?

    “That article seems to indicate that you are losing that battle. Pretty badly, too.”

    Her terrified tone of voice reveals the Truth. Stop trying to make us appear weak. We are stronger than you think.

    “Yet you still can’t get Creationist science to be taught on a state-wide scale. Excuse me whilst I chuckle at your pseudo-science.”

    It takes time to maneuver around the hurdles of the American legal system, EB. Besides, Kansas already had legalized intelligent design before the pro-psuedoscience Supreme Court, lead by that RINO Jim Jones (a Bush appointee!), destroyed our efforts. Activist judges stand in our way; the American people support our efforts.

    “So he boasts on the INTERNET, typing on a COMPUTER, sitting in a house WITH ALL THE MODERN COMFORTS, no doubt taking or have taken some form of MEDICINE at some point in his life. If Science is a fraud, then we live in a fantasy world. Free your mind, Bob.”

    These TECHONOLOGICAL inventions are the results of divinely inspired guesswork. We’ve already been over this, EB. Science is an attempt to explain how nature, space, physics, and atoms work in secular drivel, sometimes completely changing the truth of the matter. For example, science labels electrons with a negative label, while giving protons a positive one. Yet, upon further inspection, we can see that the electrons are the real hard workers, energizing things and spreading the Gospel, while the slothful protons sit idly in the center, sheltering the morally timid neutrons. At the final judgement, all protons and neutrons will be cast into the lake of fire.

    “hey maybe you all should check out my resent post on creationism. That will get all your brains ticking. my brain hurts already from reading all this. but, technology and science is great, but evil at the same time. it is a love/hate relationship.”

    I left you a couple of comments on not only that post, but a couple of others. Good work, for the most part!

    By: Ixion on July 30, 2008
    at 2:24 pm

  13. “Good work, for the most part!”

    thank you.

    but back to the fornicators, if you shoot two, you have to shoot all of them. and then the rapists and child molesters and everyone in that category. because shooting two people will surely not stop the rest of america.

    By: sillyhether on July 31, 2008
    at 3:13 pm

  14. “These TECHONOLOGICAL inventions are the results of divinely inspired guesswork.”
    If scientists discover things through divine inspiration, that means God favors them, doesn’t it?

    “For example, science labels electrons with a negative label, while giving protons a positive one. Yet, upon further inspection, we can see that the electrons are the real hard workers, energizing things and spreading the Gospel, while the slothful protons sit idly in the center, sheltering the morally timid neutrons. At the final judgement, all protons and neutrons will be cast into the lake of fire.”
    Why would the nature of their charge reflect on us? Electrical charges are not comparable to morality. Subatomic particles are not sentient, you are just an idiot who makes up his own science because he can’t understand real science.

    “So why don’t you want them to be punished in a hotel pool?”
    I never said they shouldn’t be punished, I just didn’t agree with your suggestions.

    By: Elephant Bones on July 31, 2008
    at 3:48 pm

  15. “thank you.

    but back to the fornicators, if you shoot two, you have to shoot all of them. and then the rapists and child molesters and everyone in that category. because shooting two people will surely not stop the rest of america.”

    We absolutely must shoot everyone who fornicates outside of a God-given context and child molesters. However, the LORD has different ideas on rapists and rape victims:

    “If a man meets a virgin who is not betrothed, and seizes her and lies with her, and they are found, then the man who lay with her shall give to the father fifty skelels of silver, and she shall be his wife, and he may not put her away all of his days (Deuteronomy 22; 28-29).”

    “If a damsel that is a virgin be betrothed unto an husband, and a man find her in the city, and lie with her, Then ye shall bring them both out unto the gate of that city, and ye shall stone them with stones that they die; the damsel, because she cried not, being in the city; and the man, because he hath humbled his neighbour’s wife: so thou shalt put away evil from among you.” (Deuteronomy 22:23-24)

    Deuteronomy 22 actually has wonderful advice on fornication punishments. I recommend you read it.

    My main quandry is that Juan couldn’t tell if they were married or not, or if the female was promised to another husband or not.

    “If scientists discover things through divine inspiration, that means God favors them, doesn’t it?”

    The inventor of the refrigerator, Willem Cullen, was a Christian. Paul Gottlieb Nitkow, who made the first model of a television, was a Christian. Charles Babbage, inventor of the computer, was originally a Christian, but later turned into a sodomist. Atheist scientists are the ones that make up drivel like ‘plate tectonics’, ‘pharyngulas, and ‘gravity’.

    “Why would the nature of their charge reflect on us? Electrical charges are not comparable to morality. Subatomic particles are not sentient, you are just an idiot who makes up his own science because he can’t understand real science.”

    The Bible specifically mentions them, in Matthew 7:3 “And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother’s eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye?”. In addition, the theory of atoms, or ‘motes’, has been around since Democritus. Both Democritus and the Bible acknowledge that all material has morality, although neither was very clear on how to tell whether material was moral or immoral. Thanks to science’s arbitrary, evil denominations, however, we now know the Truth.

    “I never said they shouldn’t be punished, I just didn’t agree with your suggestions.”

    Spoken like a true moonbat. I suppose you think they should be punished by being forced to eat a Tootsie Roll? Or, if they don’t like chocolate, a chicken wing?

    By: Ixion on July 31, 2008
    at 4:08 pm

  16. I’m the only one in this world. Can please someone join me in this life? Or maybe death…

    By: buraEnsurndum on April 23, 2009
    at 10:10 pm

  17. “I’m the only one in this world. Can please someone join me in this life? Or maybe death…”

    No thank you. The rest of the world is quite happy with the benefits of Christianity, among which is the ability to use the power by numbers argument.

    By: Objective Scrutator on April 23, 2009
    at 11:59 pm

  18. I want to listen good music!

    By: piskodrocho on July 10, 2009
    at 9:08 am


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